8/14/2012 11:14PM
Eric: You are so naked and sexy. I just want to eat a pizza bagel off your stomach.
Lang: Don't be gross.
Eric: Mmmm, pizza bagel.
Wednesday, 15 August 2012
The Sexy Sprint in the Olympics
August 5th, 2012 9:56PM
Eric: I'm gonna run in the Olympics tomorrow.
Lang: What?
Eric: It's a one hundred yard sexy sprint. Gotta get the women to come.
Lang: Wow.
Eric: I think I'm gonna lose.
Olympic Race
July 27th, 2012 2:14AM
Eric: Do we have an Olympic race tomorrow or are we sleeping in?
Lang: Olympic race?
Eric: It's a couple sex race. Me and you. Go to London.
Lang: Haha, is it a race or a marathon?
Eric: Yes. It's a race for you to make me come the fastest. Ready. Set. Go...you fall behind. You lose.
Drunken to Mira Mesa
July 2, 2012 12:29AM
At least the drunken from there is not the drunken to Mira Mesa.
Diablo and Cotixan
06/09/12 1:00 AM
Eric: We need to go to Cotixan and defeat it so it can drop items.
Lang: What the hell are you talking about.
Eric: Cotixan! Items! White is a taco. Blue is magic, a burrito. Yellow is, oh, yellow is rare. It's a california burrito.
Lang: I'm sorry dear, I don't know what that means.
Eric: U-TURN! U-TURN! We need a yellow!
Rusty and Convoy
5/26/12 12:26AM
(Phone rings.)
Lang: Eric. Your phone. (He answers, half awake.)
Eric: Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello.
(He hangs up and rolls over.)
Lang: Who was that?
Eric: Convoy
Lang: Convoy?
Eric: The Convoy. The shopping center. You know. At Convoy.
(Phone shows voicemail.)
Lang: You have a voice mail message.
(He listens to the message. All I hear is a man's voice saying "Eric, you fucked me...".
Lang: Who was that?
Eric: Rusty. Drunk. Made a bet that I wouldn't pick up my phone.
Lang: Hahaha. And what's with Convoy?
Eric: The Convoy. Picked up the phone. (Snores).
Thursday, 26 April 2012
Diablo
04/14/12 1:55AM
I can see Diablo when I close my eyes. Click click click click click click click click. I'm serious. Click click click click click click.
I can see Diablo when I close my eyes. Click click click click click click click click. I'm serious. Click click click click click click.
Friday, 13 April 2012
Stupid Ticket
03/19 12:32 AM
Eric: (snores loudly)
Lang: (shoves him, gently of course, to roll over)
Eric: I'm teasing! Don't be mad at me you stupid ticket.
Eric: (snores loudly)
Lang: (shoves him, gently of course, to roll over)
Eric: I'm teasing! Don't be mad at me you stupid ticket.
Whose sweater is this?
03/17/12 2:51 PM
Lang: There is a long blond hair on this sweater.
Eric: Ooh, who were you sleeping with?
Lang: This is your sweater.
Eric: Ooh, who was I sleeping with? I wanna know!
Lang: There is a long blond hair on this sweater.
Eric: Ooh, who were you sleeping with?
Lang: This is your sweater.
Eric: Ooh, who was I sleeping with? I wanna know!
God's funny?
03/26/12 1:36 AM
Eric: (Giggling). Oh god.
Lang: What are you laughing at?
E: God. I duno.
Eric: (Giggling). Oh god.
Lang: What are you laughing at?
E: God. I duno.
Pots
03/11/12 2:29 AM
Eric: Look at the pots. Pots. Look at them. Pet them.
Lang: What?
Eric: The pots. Yessss.
Lang: What are these pots?
Eric: They're here. Presents.
Eric: Look at the pots. Pots. Look at them. Pet them.
Lang: What?
Eric: The pots. Yessss.
Lang: What are these pots?
Eric: They're here. Presents.
Archaeology and Golf
03/01 11:58PM
Eric: It must be so hard for the archaeologist to go searching because we're playing golf. How do they dig down?
Lang: Why would they dig at a golf course?
Eric: How do they know what's inside the ground? So much history! But I bet they'll just find stupid arrowheads. Pfft. Indians. We sailed ships. They're like Neanderthals.
Lang: I'm sure that's not it.
Eric: Whatever. They be cleaning my bunker. Rake it! That's right! I'd be hitting in bunkers.
(Silence)
Eric: This motherfucker. Hit it! HIT IT!
Note: Just in case, sorry. He doesn't really feel this way sober/awake.
Eric: It must be so hard for the archaeologist to go searching because we're playing golf. How do they dig down?
Lang: Why would they dig at a golf course?
Eric: How do they know what's inside the ground? So much history! But I bet they'll just find stupid arrowheads. Pfft. Indians. We sailed ships. They're like Neanderthals.
Lang: I'm sure that's not it.
Eric: Whatever. They be cleaning my bunker. Rake it! That's right! I'd be hitting in bunkers.
(Silence)
Eric: This motherfucker. Hit it! HIT IT!
Note: Just in case, sorry. He doesn't really feel this way sober/awake.
Eating like a bird and Star Wars
February 2012
12:56 AM
That tasted soooo good. I want more. I want to store it in my mouth, like a bird, and then feed it to myself later.
1:15 AM
I was sleeping. And they were falling...falling...falling asleep...to Star Wars.
12:56 AM
That tasted soooo good. I want more. I want to store it in my mouth, like a bird, and then feed it to myself later.
1:15 AM
I was sleeping. And they were falling...falling...falling asleep...to Star Wars.
Spell it Smeldy
01/28/12 12:37AM
Eric: Hoooooohhhhhh. That feld good.
Lang: What felt good.
Eric: No, it smelled good. You know why? I'll tell you why. Why else would I spell it smeldy. Smeldysmeldy. Blubblub blubblublub.
Eric: Hoooooohhhhhh. That feld good.
Lang: What felt good.
Eric: No, it smelled good. You know why? I'll tell you why. Why else would I spell it smeldy. Smeldysmeldy. Blubblub blubblublub.
Eric speaks Khmer
01/12/12 12:13AM
Tominama. Tominama.
TohmTohmTohm. TohmTohm.
Notes:
Tominama = (I don't know what language this is in)
Tohm = big in Khmer
Tominama. Tominama.
TohmTohmTohm. TohmTohm.
Notes:
Tominama = (I don't know what language this is in)
Tohm = big in Khmer
Tuesday, 3 January 2012
Politically Active
12/16 1:04AM
Eric: Mmmmmm
Lang: Hmmm?
Eric: That feels good
Lang: (confused, lifts head up to look at him) what feels good?
Eric: The senate. Boxing. In time.
Lang: (Lays back down) okay.
Eric: Nevermind (disappointedly)
Eric: Mmmmmm
Lang: Hmmm?
Eric: That feels good
Lang: (confused, lifts head up to look at him) what feels good?
Eric: The senate. Boxing. In time.
Lang: (Lays back down) okay.
Eric: Nevermind (disappointedly)
Breathing is hard
10/20 11:53PM
Eric: (cough, almost choking)
Lang: You okay?
Eric: I went to breathe and I coughed nails. Nails? Nails. Webs.
Eric: (cough, almost choking)
Lang: You okay?
Eric: I went to breathe and I coughed nails. Nails? Nails. Webs.
Quesadillas and the Tick
10/19
11:50PM
Eric: You. Go Brown. Go brown now!
Lang: Yelling at your quesadillas won't make them cook faster.
Eric: But I'm hungry now.
Then, we watched the pilot episode of the Tick (live action)
2:15AM
Eric: Moth. (snorts) YEAH. What he said.
11:50PM
Eric: You. Go Brown. Go brown now!
Lang: Yelling at your quesadillas won't make them cook faster.
Eric: But I'm hungry now.
Then, we watched the pilot episode of the Tick (live action)
2:15AM
Eric: Moth. (snorts) YEAH. What he said.
Veronica vs Army of Darkness vs tri tip
09/05 2:26AM
Todd's gonna hit that! He should take pics. No. He should take pics of army of darkness cuz that shit is awwwwwwwwesome. Amiright?! Imma have dreams of tri tip.
Todd's gonna hit that! He should take pics. No. He should take pics of army of darkness cuz that shit is awwwwwwwwesome. Amiright?! Imma have dreams of tri tip.
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